


Truth in Advertising

by goodoldfashioned



Category: RedLetterMedia RPF
Genre: Begging, Confessional Sex, Desperation, Drugged Sex, M/M, Magic, Mutual Pining, Porn with Feelings, Size Difference, Size Kink, Truth Serum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-30
Packaged: 2020-05-31 11:22:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19424962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodoldfashioned/pseuds/goodoldfashioned
Summary: A shady traveling salesman named Rich comes to the VCR repair shop peddling a supposed truth serum. When Mike buys some, Jay thinks he’s stupid, because it must be fake. Mike dares Jay to drink some and find out. What will happen!





	Truth in Advertising

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try writing from a Jay character POV for once, had this idea and it seemed like a good fit!
> 
> This is about the Half in the Baaaaaag characters and their world only.
> 
> **

Summer was boring. Every year it was the same shit: awful blockbuster movies clogging up the theaters, not much to do at work, and all the shows Jay followed taking a break. Last year at least he was fooling around with that guy who had a boat, but he’d fucked that up and none of his friends owned any cool aquatic vehicles or put in the effort to properly entertain him. 

He glanced over at Mike resentfully, thinking this. Mike was half-asleep in the chair next to Jay’s at the repair shop, content as ever to just sit around doing nothing. 

“Let’s close early and go see this,” Jay said, lifting his phone to show Mike the poster for a new horror movie that had just come out. It was the only remotely interesting-looking thing that had been in theaters in months. 

Mike gave Jay’s phone a cursory glance and shrugged.

“Looks stupid,” he said, returning his gaze to the shop’s empty front room. 

“Fuck you,” Jay said. “Maybe I’ll go by myself, then.”

“No. You’re still on the clock.”

“Nobody’s coming in, Mike. Accept reality. It’s another day when we made no money.” 

Mike said nothing. Jay snarled at him, but Mike didn’t seem to notice or care. Mike was technically Jay’s boss, which was the cruellest thing about Jay’s life. He wondered for the millionth or so time why he was still here at all. He’d quit better jobs than this. 

“Ha,” Mike said, grinning and straightening up a little in his seat when someone’s wide shadow fell across the shop’s front door. “Wrong again, Jay! Here’s a customer, look lively.”

Jay tried to look as not-lively as possible as a fat, balding man in an ill-fitting suit walked in, carrying a briefcase and sweating profusely.

“Woo!” the fat man said. “It’s a hot one out today, boys!”

“Our air conditioning ain’t free,” Mike said, scowling when he peered over the counter and saw that the man didn’t seem to be in possession of a broken VCR. 

“What do you want?” Jay asked as the guy approached the counter. It was company policy that every potential customer was treated as guilty until proven profitable. 

“The name’s Rich,” the guy said, smiling at them as if this was great news. He smacked his heavy briefcase on their front counter, displacing some of the junk that was scattered there and causing two beer bottles to tumble off and shatter on the floor. Rich didn’t seem to notice, just popped open his briefcase and turned it toward them, showing them a collection of small, dark vials that were strapped to the case’s interior. “I’m here with a sales opportunity that you won’t want to miss,” he said. 

“Oh, fuck off,” Mike said. “Didn’t you see the no solicitation sign?”

“I specifically looked for one and didn’t see anything?” Rich said, frowning.

“We don’t actually have one,” Jay said. 

“Whose side are you on?” Mike asked, glaring at him. 

“It’s just the truth, Mike. I’m on the side of reality.”

Mike snorted as if he doubted this. He turned back to Rich, scowling. 

“Get out,” Mike said. “We don’t want your-- What the hell is that stuff?”

“This,” Rich said, grinning again and waving his hand in front of the displayed vials as if to tantalize them, “Is truth serum.” 

“Oh, god,” Jay said. “Get out of here with that crap.”

“Hang on, Jay,” Mike said. He frowned a little and craned his neck closer, examining the vials. “Tell me more,” he said, lifting his narrowed eyes up to Rich’s face. 

“This is the real shit, man,” Rich said, picking up one of the vials and offering it to Mike. “I may look like your average schlub, but I’m actually a master potion maker who trained with the most powerful warlocks on the southside of Chicago. I’ve spent hundreds of years developing this special formula, made from rare extracts I’ve collected from the farthest reaches of the--”

“Hundreds of years?” Jay said, snorting. “You’re like fifty at most.”

“Ha! I may look that way, young man, but that’s only ‘cause I’ve artificially extended my life via potions. I’m not selling those today, but these truth serums are a hundred percent guaranteed to work on anyone, even the best liar in the world.”

“You’re looking at him,” Mike said, smirking when Rich turned from Jay to him. “Jay is a professional grade liar.”

“Huh?” Jay scowled at Mike. “No, I’m not.” 

“Regardless,” Rich said, recapturing their attention, “I’m offering this priceless truth serum to you gentlemen today for the frankly _insane_ price of only a hundred bucks per bottle.” 

“Get fucked,” Jay said. “We don’t want your magic beans.”

“Speak for yourself, bitch,” Mike said, digging out his wallet. “Do you take American Express?”

“I certainly do, my friend!” Rich said, eagerly pulling out a square card reader for his phone.

“Mike!” Jay reached over to jab Mike in his shoulder, giving him an incredulous look. “What the hell are you doing? Wasting money on this shit? You know it can’t be real!”

“How would I know that without trying it, Jay? It’s worth a shot, I’d say.” 

“I’m afraid I can’t offer samples or demonstrations,” Rich said, punching the transaction into his phone and reaching for Mike’s card. “And, frankly, I don’t like to be in the room when truth serum is in use. Shit can get intense, fellas. Just make sure you’re in a safe environment when you try it, with someone you mutually trust.” 

“Nobody who knows Mike could possibly trust him,” Jay said. “So I guess that’s out.”

“Fuck you, Jay,” Mike said. He was grinning, sharky, when the transaction cleared on Rich’s phone.

Rich handed over one of the vials, a dark liquid that looked like Jagermeister sloshing within it. Jay wouldn’t be surprised if that’s what this shit actually was. Mike was such a fucking idiot. He deserved to buy some asshole’s fake potion, really. He believed in ghosts, liked needless romance subplots in movies, and brought all this shit on himself.

“One more word of warning,” Rich said, holding up his finger after he’d snapped his briefcase shut. “Don’t use the serum unless you really want to hear the truth. If you love somebody, and you dose ‘em, you might get some information that you didn’t want to hear. Because this shit is potent, okay? Everything will come tumbling out of whoever takes it.”

“What’s the dosage?” Mike asked, eyes glossy. Jay recoiled from him, disgusted. 

“There’s a dropper attached to the cap,” Rich said. “Just one drop, directly on the tongue for best results.”

“Excellent,” Mike said, holding the vial up in front of his face. 

“Have fun!” Rich said, already backing toward the front door. “And heed my words, gentlemen. Be careful when you think about who you want to hear the truth from. Open up those floodgates at your own risk!”

He cackled in a way that would be disturbing if he were talking about a real truth serum that worked, if such a thing could ever even exist, and left the shop with a menacing wink that made Jay squirm in his seat. Jay disliked everything about this, even if it was just some bullshit con that Mike of course had fallen for. He especially disliked the predatory look Mike was suddenly giving him.

“No,” Jay said. “Get that shit away from me.”

“What’s the harm, Jay, if it’s fake anyway?”

“Uhhh, it was just sold to you by a strange man who looks like maybe he has people buried in his basement?”

“Nah, that guy was a legit warlock, I could see it on his face.”

“Mike, shut the fuck up.” 

“I _dare_ you to take one drop on your tongue, Jay,” Mike said, dangling the vial in front of his face. “To prove to me that it won’t do anything.” 

Jay wrinkled his nose and stared at the vial. He didn’t want to ingest some strange substance, but he did very badly want to prove Mike wrong. Doing so was his favorite thing in the world.

“C’mon, don’t be a wimp,” Mike said, unscrewing the cap. “You act like you’re so edgy, such a desensitized little badass, but you’re just a big scaredy-cat. Afraid of a little witches’ brew. Afraid of the truth!”

“Fuck you,” Jay said, glaring at him. “I’m not afraid of anything.”

“Yeah, yeah, so you’re always telling me. So? Gonna put your money where your mouth is for once?”

“How about this, shithead,” Jay said. “I’ll take some if you do.”

“Ha!” Mike threw his head back and laughed. “Yeah, okay. I’ll do it with you. I’m not the one with deep dark secrets and spooky skeletons in his closet. What you see is what you get, with me. Got nothing to hide.”

Mike was babbling anxiously like maybe he did have something big to hide, actually. 

Jay’s eyebrows went up. He almost wished this shit was real truth serum, because he would fucking love to hear Mike admit a thing or two that Jay had long suspected about him. 

“Okay,” Jay said, reaching for the vial. “Let’s do it.”

“You gotta let me administer it,” Mike said, tapping the wet end of the dropper against the mouth of the vial. “To get the dosage right.” 

“Fuck no, you’re going to squirt a whole stream of that shit in my mouth.” 

Mike smirked and passed the vial to Jay, caught.

Jay shook his head. As if this was his first rodeo. As if he couldn’t always tell what Mike was up to, when he was lying, where his demented mind went with every opportunity.

Mike watched ravenously as Jay stuck his tongue out and put a tiny drop of the stuff on it, then passed it back to Mike. Jay winced a little. The stuff tasted familiar, like some bitter herb, but he couldn’t put his finger on what the flavor was. He thought he was going to have to forcibly make Mike keep his end of the bargain and put a drop on his own tounge, but to his surprise Mike did so right away, holding Jay’s gaze while he swallowed the stuff down and screwed the cap back on the vial. 

“Shit,” Mike said. “We didn’t ask him how long it takes for it to start working.” 

“It doesn’t fucking matter,” Jay said. He crossed his arms over his chest, feeling absolutely nothing except the blissful anticipation of telling Mike _I told you so_. “Nothing’s going to happen.”

“We’ll just see about that, Jay.” Mike set the vial on a shelf to his right and gave Jay a wicked smirk. “We will see.” 

Jay grunted and turned back to the shop’s front door. He was one hundred percent certain Mike would pretend to be affected by this stuff and start doing fucked up things like fake love confessions or worse. He braced himself for that to happen, preparing the stoic, unconvinced expression he would keep on his face the whole time.

While waiting for Mike to start up with whatever obnoxious joke he had in mind, having spent a hundred bucks on a new opportunity to be annoying, Jay thought about what he might confess if a real truth serum did exist. He didn’t consider himself a secretive person, though he didn’t love talking about various things, such as his feelings, the past, how he’d ended up with this job and why he still had it, what he got up to away from work, or how often he jerked off to certain things he was afraid to try in real life, because most men in Milwaukee were disgusting, even the ones who looked good at first glance. How hard was it for people to keep their own fucking bodies at least relatively clean, really? He started sweating angrily, just thinking about it. Then he realized he was sweating a lot, suddenly boiling hot all over.

He turned to Mike, his heart rate picking up with the start of real panic, because holy shit what did he just put in his body sheerly for the sake of making Mike feel like an idiot? He expected to see Mike smirking at him, enjoying the fact that Jay was getting visibly red across the cheeks, but Mike looked panicked, too. 

“Do you feel hot?” Mike asked, wiping at the back of his neck.

“Call poison control,” Jay said, watching Mike’s cheeks get pink, too. 

“No, no, just. Wait a minute, hang on. Let’s see what happens.”

“Mike--”

“Don’t be a wimp, Jay! You’re such a baby, jesus christ.”

Jay scowled and dragged his eyes away from Mike, wondering if he would really sit here and die of poisoning just to prove to Mike that he wasn’t a baby. _Mike_ was a fucking baby. Mike, who believed in invisible spirits and true love and magic potions. Fucking asshole, calling Jay a baby. Jay lived in the _real world_. He had perspective. 

The hot feeling passed, and it was replaced with something much nicer, like a cool breeze moving through Jay’s chest and rustling tall grasses inside him. Jay shivered and rubbed his hands over his face, swallowing down something like a moan. Because, oh no, what. Was happening?

“I feel weird,” Mike said. He was wide-eyed when Jay glanced over at him, also gripping the seat of his chair with both hands. 

“You’re imagining things,” Jay said, and he winced when a shivery feeling moved from the back of his neck and down his spine, along his limbs, all the way to his heels and back up again. He’d snorted coke only once, and this was kind of like that, but better. He was starting to shake a little, starting to feel really, like. Good.

Mike moaned and rubbed his hand over his face. 

“Don’t do that,” Jay said, pinching his eyes shut.

“Do-- What?”

“Don’t make that noise.”

“What noise?” 

Jay didn’t answer, just leapt out of his chair and pushed everything off the front counter: magazines, beer bottles, old order forms, VCR parts, even the computer monitor and keyboard, which went crashing down to the front lobby area. 

Mike made the moaning noise again, and this time it sounded approving, like: yeah, fuck that shit up, Jay!

“I’ve always wanted to do this,” Jay said, climbing up onto the counter. He was laughing low in his chest, feeling distantly like things were already out of control and like he needed to rein himself in, but also really not fucking wanting to, at all. He was grinning when he flopped onto his back on the front counter, only his heels hanging over the end. “Yeah,” he said, flexing his shoulders and spreading his legs a little. “I fit, I do.” 

“Jesus fucking christ.” Mike jumped out of his chair so fast that he knocked it over. Jay laughed, hands going to his belly. He felt better than drunk, like this was some pure, clean high that would never betray him with a hangover or dry mouth when he came down from it. Later: much later. He was just getting started, feeling like this.

“Your eyes,” Jay said, laughing again when he met Mike’s swimmy gaze. “You look crazy.” 

“I feel crazy,” Mike said, blinking rapidly. He licked his lips as his gaze moved from Jay’s face down to his jittery chest, lower, then back up again. “I’ve, yeah, I’ve always-- Wanted to do this, actually.”

Mike reached for Jay, his hands going to the buttons on Jay’s Lightning Fast shirt. Jay laughed again and watched as Mike tried to open the buttons with his shaky, clumsy hands, obviously overcome by some unstoppable urge: by the truth, Jay thought, arching his back a little. 

“I fuckin’ knew it,” Jay said when Mike pulled his shirt open and made that moaning noise again, staring at Jay’s bare chest. 

“Knew what,” Mike said, licking his lips while he looked down at Jay’s peaked nipples, then up at his face. 

“You fuck guys, too.”

“I do not.” 

“Then why’d you just pull my shirt open, and why--” Jay turned his cheek to make sure, and he laughed when he saw he was right, his hands twitching against the countertop, wanting. “Why are you getting hard just for the sight of my bare chest?”

“I’ve never fucked a guy before,” Mike said. He swallowed and reached for Jay, clamping one hand around his waist. “Doesn’t mean I don’t want to.” 

“Oh, me?” Jay grinned and folded his hands behind his head, preening and opening his chest wider for Mike’s hungry stare, taunting him with it. “You just want to fuck me, is that it?”

“Nnn,” Mike said, chewing his lips to hold in some honest answer. “I need, like-- Tequila, and salt, and a lime.”

“That’s so fucking corny,” Jay said, laughing hard. “You want to do tequila shots off me? What’s wrong with you?”

“Lots of things,” Mike said: which was the truth, certainly. “The biggest one being this.”

“This?”

“This,” Mike said, leaning down to bring his mouth to Jay’s exposed belly. 

Jay half expected Mike to take a bite out of him, his confession amounting to cannibalism, but he only licked Jay from his happy trail up to his belly button with his wide, flat tongue. Jay moaned without meaning to, because it felt good, and he had to tell the truth. He put his hands in Mike’s hair and made a little whining noise under his breath when Mike licked him again. 

Jay was starting to get hard, too, and it wasn’t fair. He’d worked tirelessly over the years on his many methods for ignoring his secret, shameful desire to get absolutely obliterated on Mike’s dick. Now all his efforts were up in smoke with the snap of some warlock’s fingers.

He didn’t care that much, however, when Mike moved higher, licking over Jay’s ribs while Jay’s breath stuttered out of him and his dick got harder against the front of his jeans. 

“Fuck, _fuck_ ,” Mike said, murmuring this against Jay’s skin as he closed in on Jay’s right nipple, just breathing on it at first. “You taste so good,” he said, whining this out like a complaint when he looked up to meet Jay’s eyes. “I knew you would, you fuck.”

“How long have you been thinking about how I might taste?” Jay asked, annoyance breaking through his reverie. What was the point of hiding it, when Mike knew Jay was gay? He claimed to have known from the start, which pissed Jay off but was probably true.

Mike looked like he was doing some scientific calculations in his head, gaze unfocused and brow slightly pinched. 

“Ever since the first time you were in my car,” Mike said. “When I gave you a ride to the airport that time, and you were all, like. Grateful. You needed me.”

“What! That was like three months after we met!”

“Yeah, I know, Jay.”

“Mike, you asshole.” Jay pressed his lips together and breathed hard through his nose. “Get back to work,” he said, rubbing his fingertip around his right nipple to indicate what he wanted Mike to work on. “You owe me like fifteen years’ worth of orgasms, so get busy.”

Mike narrowed his eyes and brought his hands to Jay’s waist again. His hands were huge, and his grip was tight enough to make Jay worry that if Mike went into Hulk mode he might crush Jay’s internal organs in a fit of passion. 

“Like you would have put out for me back when we first met,” Mike said. “Or a year ago. Or yesterday.”

“Mhm,” Jay said, as noncommittally as possible with the truth serum coursing through him. 

“Or-- Wait.” Mike’s evil smile made Jay squirm. As if in response to this squirming, Mike’s grip on him tightened even more. “What’s this, Jay? Were you just waiting for me to ask, is that all? Have you thought about taking my dick?”

“Yes,” Jay said, grinding the answer out from between his clenched teeth. “So--” 

“How many times, approximately.”

“Oh god, jesus christ--” Jay winced, could feel the honest answer to this question tearing out of him already. “Countless times!” he said, shouting this as if some traitorous thing in his body was deriving pleasure from admitting it. His heart was pounding, and he was trapped between Mike’s hands, so hard for him, completely fucked and not even sorry about it, because he was going to get fucked for real, literally, finally, by Mike.

“You sneaky little bitch,” Mike said, grinning. His hands flexed on Jay’s waist, and it felt like a warning. “Acting like you were too good for me this whole time, while--”

“What the fuck! I don’t act like that.” Jay felt good about this statement, because if he was able to say it out loud, it must be true. “Jesus, when we met I looked like a Garbage Pail Kid. Why would you, ah--?”

“You did not.” Mike looked distressed, and stroked Jay’s belly with his thumbs as if to console him. “I liked the way you looked back then, too. I have a type, Jay.” 

Jay’s eyebrows went up. “Fat hillbilly?”

“You were not fat. The kids call it thicc.”

“Why are we talking about this? Use your mouth for something better, please.”

Mike smiled in a way that Jay found worrying, also hot. Jay held his breath and watched as Mike lowered his head again, moving toward the nipple Jay had indicated as needing attention. He licked Jay there, softly at first, and snickered when this got a little noise of approval from Jay, something he couldn’t hold in, just like the rest of what had already come out of his mouth. It morphed into a deep groan when Mike licked him harder and then closed his teeth around Jay’s nipple, biting him just gently before adding more pressure, more.

“Ah, careful,” Jay said, afraid Mike might be unhinged enough at present to just bite his nipple off entirely, should his enthusiasm build too much. 

“Careful.” Mike scoffed, but he also gave Jay a soft lick again, soothing his tongue over Jay’s nipple while it throbbed, little aftershocks of pain racing down Jay’s spine and making his cock leak into his boxers. “Like, really?” Mike said when Jay managed to foggily meet his gaze again. “That’s how you want to be fucked, carefully? Jay, you surprise me.”

“I didn’t say-- I just meant--”

“How do you want me, Jay?” Mike asked, his eyes bright as he waited to hear the true answer to this question, like someone had lit twin dumpster fires behind them. “Hmm?” Mike said when Jay started breathing harder. He pinched Jay’s left nipple between his fingers, twisted it. “You want it gentle? Soft and slow? Want me to make love to you with _care_?”

“Fuck no.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought. So, tell me. What do you like.”

There were lots of ways Jay could answer this question. He liked lots of things, had been with plenty of guys, was almost forty years old and had tried most everything at least once. He could feel what he was going to say, worst among all possible answers, and tried to bite his tongue to hold it in, but his teeth wouldn’t cooperate. 

“There’s a gloryhole at my favorite bar,” he said, feeling his face get hot as he blurted this out. He dick throbbed in his jeans as if it was all in favor of this honesty. “It’s, that’s. My favorite thing, uh. To do. Lately.”

Mike’s eyes were huge. When he started to smile, Jay was sure that he was going to get brutally made fun of, but Mike was also rubbing both of Jay’s nipples with his thumbs, using a perfect amount of varying pressure, so maybe he was more interested in just giving Jay what he wanted. Though Jay didn’t want a gloryhole right now, not if he could have the real Mike instead of the one he pretended was in the neighboring bathroom stall.

“What do you like about the gloryhole?” Mike asked, looking like he already knew.

“It’s-- Ah, _yeah_.” Jay moaned, because Mike was still rubbing at his nipples, but ultimately he couldn’t hold the answer in: “It’s impersonal. And dirty, disgusting. I have to kneel on this filthy bathroom floor when, when I-- I don’t know, I don’t know. It makes me feel sloppy and cheap and gross and gets me off so hard, it doesn’t make any sense, but. I fucking love it when some random shithead is fucking my face and calling me names from the other stall. It’s, I. I’m fucked up.”

“Yes, you are.” Mike leaned in to seal this with a kiss, pressing his lips to Jay’s with weird tenderness. He licked over Jay’s panting mouth before pulling back, one hand still sliding over Jay’s chest while he cupped Jay’s hot face with the other, tilting it toward his and thumbing at the corner of Jay’s mouth like he was thinking about slipping his fingers inside, or something else. “How many random strangers have fucked your mouth, would you say?” he asked, his gaze sharpening with something animalistic that wasn’t just lust. He looked kind of angry, maybe.

“I don’t know,” Jay said, whining. “Mike, I--” 

“What, Jay. Tell me.”

“Nn, no--”

“Tell me, Jay, it’s okay. Let it out.” 

“I pretended they were you.” Jay smashed his eyes shut and shook his head, moaning with some combination of regret and relief, because there was no taking _that_ back. “Fuck, fuck, I wanted it to be you, so many times. Every time. I--”

He was cut off by Mike kissing him again, pressing his hot tongue into Jay’s mouth like it belonged there. Jay grabbed Mike’s ears and held him there, whining into his mouth and opening wide for him. He let Mike shove his tongue in deep and tried to keep up, lapping at him wetly and feeling blown apart by that confession, by the taste of Mike’s mouth, everything. 

“It’s okay,” Mike said, eyes wheeling when he pulled back to breathe. He stroked Jay’s cheek with his thumb like he wanted to be careful with him after all, at least a little. “I jerk off to you, uh. Sometimes four times a day. If you look really good at work I’ll go do it in the sink back there. Or if you piss me off and I can’t stop thinking about how much I want to bend you over the counter and spank your annoying little ass like it’s company policy.”

Jay moaned and thurst his hips up, wishing Mike was on top of him, inside him, anything. 

“It should be,” Jay said, laughing crazily. “Policy. I’d let you.”

“Mhmm, _fuck_. I’m gonna mess you the fuck up on this dick, you want that?”

“Yes, _yes_ , yeah, please--”

“I should also tell you,” Mike said, swallowing and bringing both hands up to frame Jay’s face. “I, uh. I don’t just want to have raunchy sex with you.” 

“What?” Jay felt panicked, wouldn’t survive if this suddenly changed course. “I, you can do whatever, I’m fucking ready, I want it--”

“No, I don’t think you understand. I want other things from you, Jay.”

“Like-- What?”

“I want you to cuddle with me while I watch Star Trek and listen with great interest while I rattle off obscure trivia about every episode.” 

Mike said this very gravely, as if he was confessing that he’d dreamed about fucking Jay’s corpse. 

“Oh god.” Jay rolled his eyes. “Same here, only replace Star Trek with some horror movie from the 80s that you think is lame. Who cares! Fuck me!”

Mike grinned. He kissed Jay on the mouth again, then looked down at Jay’s tented erection. Jay was moving his hips around erratically, burning up with need. 

“Please,” Jay said when Mike met his eyes, because suddenly Mike was not touching him anywhere and Jay felt like he was going to die of this if it wasn’t immediately corrected. “Mike--”

“I know what you want,” Mike said. 

There was evil in his eyes. Jay almost hated that he was so attracted to that look and to everything else about Mike that meant Jay was in for it, doomed. Mike was basically the prince of darkness, and Jay had been fantasizing about being fucked by the devil since high school. He chewed his lips to hold in moans and clutched at his stomach, fighting the urge to just reach down and start jacking himself through his jeans while Mike watched.

“If you know what I want,” Jay said, doubting that even Mike could guess the full extent of it. “Give it to me.”

“Hmm, not yet. First, since you’re under the influence of truth serum, I need to ask you some questions.”

“Nn, no, Mike, later--”

“Ah-ah, Jay.” Mike held up a finger and wagged it at Jay. It was a cheesy gesture that Jay hated deeply, mostly because he’d caught himself doing it, too, in recent years. “We don’t know how long this stuff lasts, and god knows you’ll never take it in my presence again now that you know it really works. That is, at least not-- Knowingly.”

“I’ll kill you,” Jay said, whining this out pathetically and hating how non-threatening he sounded. 

“Maybe,” Mike said. “But first. If you want me to do things to you, filthy things, all the things you dreamed about while you were on your knees for nasty perverts in a bathroom stall at that bar, first you’re going to answer my questions. Truthfully.”

“Fine, fuck, just--! Hurry up, nn, I feel. I need--”

Jay bit his lip to hold it in, but Mike could be freakishly patient when he thought doing so would get him what he wanted. He waited, eyebrows lifted, for Jay to spit it out.

“I need your dick,” Jay said, trying to glare at Mike even while saying so. He was pretty sure he just looked pitiful and helpless, like he was begging. Because he was. “Mike, please, let me-- Let me suck you off, at least, god--”

“I will, oh ho ho, I will, Jay. Don’t you worry about that. Sucking my dick is just the beginning of all the fun shit I’m gonna let you do to get me off. But first! The questions.”

“Fine.” Jay got a hold of himself, a little, and narrowed his eyes at Mike. “But you’re on the serum, too, asshole. For every question you ask, I’ll be asking one, too.”

“Ha, yeah? Well, one of us is a very creative sadist and the other one is a little edgelord masochist who thinks Nicholas Winding Refn movies are deep, so we’ll just see who comes out on top here.” 

“I never said they were deep! I just like the aesthetic! And where the fuck do you get off lecturing me about movies I like not being deep enough? God, you liked _Jurassic World_!”

“Oh, Jay. So cute when you’re angry.” 

Mike pinched Jay’s nipples hard, like a little reward for this. Jay keened and arched up into it, trying to hold Mike’s hands against his chest. He whined when he was unsuccessful in this, thrashing for how badly he needed Mike to touch him again, anywhere. Guys who stuck their dicks through that gloryhole always called him a little slut. Now it was like he was being punished for how true that was, the reality of it coursing mercilessly through his whole body while Mike watched, plotting.

Jay smashed his lips together and tried to regain control of his breathing. Mike was a slut, too, Jay was well aware. Just for different things. More embarrassing things, really. Jay would have his revenge soon.

“So,” Mike said, licking his lips like a wolf, about to pounce. “First question. Remember last week, when I ordered the five for five dollars deal at Arby’s and couldn’t finish the fifth sandwich, so I left it here in the fridge at work?”

Jay recoiled. Mike looked serious.

“Did you or did you not eat that fifth sandwich after making fun of me for eating Arby’s, Jay? After implying that my Arby’s habit is why I’m fat? Making you a huge hypocrite?”

“No, Mike, I didn’t eat your nasty leftover Arby’s,” Jay said, truthfully. “You probably ate it yourself while you were drunk. You just don’t remember. Or maybe Plinkett broke in and stole it. Regardless, yes, Arby’s is why you’re fat. Stop eating garbage every day, jesus christ! You’re too old for that shit. You have to start taking care of yourself, whether you like it or not. I need you to live at least as long as I do.”

“Why’s that, Jay.”

“Because I’d shrivel up and fucking die without you.”

Jay’s eyes widened when he heard himself say that. 

Mike made a startled noise under his breath and put his hand on Jay’s belly, stroking him there. He took his hand away when Jay grabbed his wrist and tried to shove Mike’s palm down against his aching dick. Jay whined when this didn’t work, and gripped both sides of the counter, writhing like he was possessed by a demon. He felt that way, but also like the demon was just him, his true self.

“Next question,” Mike said, rubbing his hand over his face.

“Nope,” Jay said. “My turn.”

“Ugh, fine. Whatcha got, do your worst.”

“Did you really like _Jurassic World_?” Jay asked. “Or were you just pretending you did because you knew it would piss me the fuck off?”

He wasn’t even sure what the worse answer was. Mike was wincing as if this question had cut deep.

“Pretending!” Mike said when he couldn’t hold it in any longer, groaning around the word. “Goddammit. You can tell? When I do that?”

“Most of the time. Sometimes I ponder the depths of your dementedness and I can’t be sure.”

Mike grinned like this was a compliment. Maybe he was just happy to know that Jay had pondered him. 

“Okay, next question,” Mike said.

Jay whined. “How many are there?” he asked, still debating whether he was gone enough to reach down and palm his tented dick while Mike watched. He’d always had a kind of phobia about people seeing him jerk off. His favorite thing about the gloryhole was that nobody got to watch him be disgusting, not even the person whose dick he was sucking.

“I have two more questions,” Mike said. “Then I’ll give you what you need, Jay.”

“Fine, go!”

“Are you still letting that douchehole Denny fuck you? The guy with the boat?”

“No.” Jay rolled his eyes. “Why do you care?” he asked, as his own next question.

“Because I hate everybody who gets to fuck you. Especially if they’re riding you around Lake Michigan on a stupid little boat while they do it.”

Jay grinned and chewed his lip. Mike narrowed his eyes like Jay being pleased with himself was going to have dire consequences. Jay hoped so.

“Why’d you break up with that one?” Mike asked, eying Jay’s crotch like he couldn’t wait much longer either. “The boat one.”

“He told me I was mean-spirited and emotionally stunted. I got real angry about that and told him he sucked in bed and that I was only letting him fuck me because he had a boat.”

Mike beamed at Jay and moved down to the end of the counter. He pulled off one of Jay’s shoes, then the other, and flung his socks off with a similar urgency. 

“Lock the door first,” Jay said, flinching away when Mike reached for the button on Jay’s jeans. “And, uh. I have one more question.” 

“What would you do if I said I’d only fuck you with the door unlocked?” Mike asked, stealing Jay’s turn. 

“I’d be sad,” Jay said, without meaning to. He scowled at himself, but this response at least got Mike to hurry over to the door and lock it. 

“So you _can_ experience sadness!” Mike said, also turning the OPEN sign around to CLOSED.

“Yes, Mike. Why does everybody think I’m so emotionally undeveloped?”

“Because you want them to think so, Jay, but don’t worry. You never fooled me, not really.”

“Then why-- God, never mind. Final question. When you were fucking other people--” He was thinking of a specific one, the woman who stained the sofa at Jay’s apartment by spilling red wine on it, and who used to call him and Mike codependant like it was a hilarious joke and not something she was obviously jealous about. “--Were you thinking about me, ever?”

“Ever?” Mike said, eyebrows going up as he approached the counter. “More like always. Take your pants off. Underwear, too.”

Jay whimpered and lifted his hips, already doing it. Mike helped him strip his pants off along with the boxers, pulling them over his ankles and flinging them across the room. Jay was breathing hard as soon as he was exposed from the waist down, knees bent and feet planted on the countertop, his shirt still on but pushed wide open around his chest.

“I gotta take a picture,” Mike said, sounding emotional as he reached into his pocket.

“No!” Jay kicked him, softly. “No pictures.” 

“Your dick,” Mike said, licking his lips and staring at it. 

“What about it?” Jay asked, knees flinching together. He was so hard, wet at the tip and dribbling onto himself already.

“It’s perfect, like. Adorable.”

“Fuck you, I’m not even small!” It was the one part of him that wasn’t tiny, and he had always been proud of this. 

“No, I mean, I know.” Mike grinned and tilted his head, winked. “Compared to mine, though.” 

Jay swallowed at the thought of Mike’s monstrous cock. He hoped it was scary-looking and veiny, some real horror movie shit. He could see by the bulge in Mike’s pants that it was big, and had noticed this before, even when he wasn’t hard. 

“Please do something,” Jay said, starting to shake all over. “I think, ah. That wizard put something evil in the truth serum, some aphrodisiac thing.” 

“Oh, Jay,” Mike said, closing in on him. He put one hand on each of Jay’s knees and eased his bent legs apart, as wide as he could get them with Jay’s heels still braced on the counter. Jay moaned for the feeling of being spread open like that, exposed. “That’s just you,” Mike said, softly, as if to console him, his thumbs stroking over Jay’s knees in a way that made him shiver. “You’re just like this. It’s the truth about you.” 

“Fuck,” Jay said, pinching his eyes shut like he could hide from this, though his whole body was responding to it with tightening need, goosebumps rising all over him. It felt like everything in him except his rational mind had been dying to confess, waiting for this moment. “Mike.”

“Shh, I’m here. I gotcha, c’mere.”

Mike lifted him off the counter. Jay almost hated how good it felt to be carried into the back room like he weighed nothing, then didn’t care anymore because his mouth was on Mike’s throat, and Mike moaned when Jay dragged his teeth over his pounding pulse. 

“Yours tastes good, too,” Jay said, meaning Mike’s skin. He licked Mike’s neck again, not sure why he was surprised. Mike was salty and warm and Jay was already thinking about what his dick would taste like, and how his jaw would ache after he’d sucked Mike off.

“A girl once told me I smelled like a hot dog,” Mike said, sounding a little mournful about this. Jay had to hold in a laugh.

“Hot dogs smell fucking delicious,” he said, with complete honesty, when Mike deposited him on the couch in the back room. 

“You’re biased,” Mike said, and he snickered when Jay punched his shoulder. 

“Take this off,” Jay said, tugging at the collar of Mike’s shirt. 

“Patience, patience. Sit up, here, like this.”

Mike arranged Jay so that he was at the center of the couch, facing outward with his feet up on the cushions, legs bent. Jay’s face was burning as Mike lowered to his knees on the floor in front of him, watching Jay’s eyes and then finally looking down, between his spread-apart legs. Mike took hold of Jay’s hips and shifted him so he was even more exposed, tilted back against the couch so Mike had access to his ass. Jay gasped and brought his arm up to cover his face, mouth hanging open when Mike reached down to spread his ass cheeks apart.

“Oh, fuh, fuck--” Jay said, his thighs starting to shake. 

“Shh-shh, you’re a mess already, here. Let me help.”

Mike pulled him open a little wider, and Jay’s breath caught in a shudder when he felt Mike’s breath on his skin, hot against his defenseless hole. 

Jay was afraid to look. He squeaked and jerked in Mike’s hands, leaving his arm over his face even when he felt Mike lick him, experimentally at first and then more firmly. Mike’s tongue was wet for this, wide and flat and hungry. He moaned and tightened his grip on Jay’s spread open ass cheeks, devouring him like he was on the menu at fucking Arby’s. 

“Fuck,” Jay said, his voice barely working. It felt so good, almost too intense for how weird it was, too, the filthiest thing he’d ever done, and not because he’d never been rimmed before-- He had, and he loved it, though rarely asked for it because he didn’t want the average douchehole who fucked him knowing how much he wanted it. He also didn’t want them seeing him like this: legs pulled up against his chest, breathless and dribbling precome onto his belly, moaning uncontrollably for how good it felt. This was different, dirtier, better, because it was Mike doing it, because Mike just _knew_ Jay would go to pieces for it, didn’t need to be asked. 

Jay peeked over his trembling arm and saw Mike looking up at him while still working his tongue there, eyes dark. He was somehow smirking and smug even while he ate Jay out like it was his job. Mike moaned against him, sounding like he was enjoying himself immensely, and Jay cursed for how good that moan felt vibrating across his already sensitive skin. Mike was going to town on him like the shameless glutton he was, pushing the tip of his tongue inside as soon as Jay relaxed enough to let him. Jay put his hands over his face when he couldn’t stand the sight of this in addition to the feeling, because he felt his balls getting tight and didn’t want to come yet. 

“Hey,” Mike snapped, and Jay whined, already missing his mouth. “Hands down,” Mike said, reaching up to grab one of Jay’s arms and pull it free. “I’ll tie them behind your back if I have to.”

“Wha-- What--” Jay wanted to be tied up, kinda, maybe later, but in the meantime was so trembly with the need for more of what Mike was doing to him that he didn’t know what was happening. 

“Don’t cover your face.” Mike bit at the inside of Jay’s thigh, still holding his gaze. “I want to see you. I’ve put in the time, I deserve it. Thought about what you’d look like, so much.”

“So?” Jay asked, not feeling particularly attractive at the moment, with his spit-slick ass pointed at Mike’s face and his cheeks bright red, eyes leaky. “Hah, how is it? The reality?”

“Fucking perfect,” Mike said, in a way that would have made Jay laugh if Mike wasn’t already swooping back down to lick him again, making him moan instead.

Jay started to whimper when the attentions of Mike’s tongue began to feel like both too much and not enough. He wanted Mike to touch his dick while still licking into him like that, wanted to come and get sloppy and soft-headed in the aftermath, to still be shaking from it when Mike shoved his dick or even just his fingers inside. His tongue felt good, pressing in, licking Jay open, but nowhere near deep enough, hard enough.

“Mike,” Jay said, trying to squirm away from his mouth when he couldn’t take it any more, ready to beg for penetration. “Muh, Mike, wait--”

“Hold still,” Mike said, his grip on Jay tightening when Jay disobeyed him. 

“Ah, can you, please--”

“Touch yourself if you need to get off. I don’t care how many times you come, Jay. As many as you need, just go ahead.” 

Jay whined and pinched his eyes shut, hands in fists as he fought the urge to just reach down and stroke himself. He would only need a few tight passes of his hand to get off, and he needed to come, bad, felt feverish with it. 

He peeked down at Mike, who was patient in his evil way, still making out with Jay’s ass while he watched him squirm. The look in Mike’s eyes told Jay that he’d somehow figured out that Jay didn’t want to touch himself while anyone watched, not even Mike, not yet.

“Could you--” Jay said, lifting his hips. “Ah, please--”

Mike’s stubble was starting to chafe a little, but it felt good, almost like the something more Jay needed to get off, though not quite. He needed Mike to touch his cock, would come for the first squeeze from one of his massive hands. He twitched his hips and whined, tried to beg with just his eyes. 

Mike saw this begging and went on contenting himself with his tongue up Jay’s ass, hands staying where they were, keeping him spread open. 

“Please,” Jay tried. “Mike, you could, help me, just--”

“Don’t make me repeat myself,” Mike said, flexing his fingers into the meat of Jay’s thighs, which were shaking hard. “Do what you need to take care of yourself. I can’t keep track of how often you need to come. We both know it’s gonna be, like, a lot. That’s on you. I can wait.”

Jay breathed out through his nose, lips pressed together to hold in more desperate whining. He saw what Mike was doing, even more than just teasing him for not wanting to jerk off with an audience. He was also making a point of how slutty or weak Jay was for needing to come this bad already, because Mike had worked him over so well. 

Mike went back to work on Jay’s ass, which was starting to feel a little raw from so much attention. Jay scooted forward to drape his tired legs over Mike’s shoulders, and they both groaned for how good it felt, this position opening Jay up a little wider for Mike’s tongue. It also made Jay feel even more like he was going to die if he couldn’t come soon, right now.

Jay moved his hand toward his dick as surreptitiously as possible, but of course Mike’s eyes went right to it. He looked darkly pleased, both to watch Jay touch himself and to continue plunging his tongue into Jay’s ass before pulling it out to tease around the rim. He had a rhythm going, and Jay was helpless in his hands, hiccuping something that was a little too much like a sob when he finally wrapped his hand around his cock and started stroking himself while Mike watched. 

Their eyes locked when Jay was close, shaking and tight all over with the need to spill. He pumped himself hard, precome slicked against his palm and acting as lube, and sort of snarled down at Mike when he felt himself breaking, going over the edge. 

Mike brought his thumb up to rub around the wet mess he’d made of Jay’s ass, and that was what did it: Jay not only came, he came screaming Mike’s name. 

It felt so good that he didn’t even care that Mike would give him hell for that last part. Jay let himself go limp all over as he pumped out the last drops, groaning under his breath, eyes half shut and legs still draped over Mike’s shoulders, holding him in place while he watched. 

“Fuck,” Mike said, softly, like he was impressed. 

Jay grinned. He’d forgotten for a moment that Mike was on the truth serum, too. 

“Don’t you fucking dare,” Jay said when Mike released his ass cheeks and moved up like he was going to try to kiss Jay on the mouth. Jay turned his head away and slapped at Mike when he smiled and moved closer. 

“You’re out there sucking dudes off through gloryholes, but that’s too hardcore for you?”

Mike moved down to kiss Jay’s chest instead, licking up some of his come in the process. 

“You’re disgusting,” Jay said, his spent dick twitching as he watched this. 

“So are you,” Mike said. “Can’t wait to get you really dirty. God, you’re gonna be _soaked_ in my come, and you’re gonna fucking love it, aren’t ya?”

“Mhm,” Jay said, trying to make this answer sound as vague as possible. He licked his lips, and Mike snickered, still clamped between Jay’s legs. 

“Did they ever get rough with you?” Mike asked, reaching up to rub his fingertips over Jay’s lips. He looked sad, maybe because they couldn’t kiss again until Mike brushed his teeth. Jay may have been out of his mind on truth serum, but he still had limits.

“What?” Jay said. “Rough-- Who? The gloryhole people?”

“Yeah. Them.”

“Uhh, I guess? I like it rough, so.”

“I know you do.” Mike sighed and pushed his fingers between Jay’s lips, rubbed at his tongue and fucked into his mouth a little, breathing harder. “So wet,” Mike said, dragging his fingers in and out. 

“‘Cause I came,” Jay said, voice muffled against Mike’s fingers. He sucked at them, moving his tongue around the pads in a swirling motion, trying to entice Mike to replace them with his dick.

“You love sucking cock that much?” Mike said. “That, you’d. Just let anybody?”

Jay shrugged one shoulder. He thought the answer was obvious, at this point. 

“I wanted it to be you,” he said-- again --when Mike pulled his fingers out.

“Why?” Mike asked.

That question felt unfair, dirty. Jay quirked his lips and lowered his legs, sitting up. His thighs were already aching, and his ass felt overstimulated and too empty at the same time.

“I think you’ve probably got a nice dick,” Jay said, sort of answering that question while also ducking it. “So. Do you?”

“Nice?” Mike snorted and stood. Jay smiled up at him when he saw Mike was a little wobbly on his legs and very hard in his pants, straining. “I wouldn’t use the word nice,” Mike said, unbuttoning his jeans. “Though a monsterfucker like you might think so.”

“I have never fucked monsters, Mike,” Jay said, looking up into his face again as he unzipped his pants. “Just wanted to.” 

“Yeah, well, you’re about to live your dream.”

Jay shifted his gaze down to watch the big unveiling. Mike didn’t push his boxers down, just pulled his cock out through the slit, which looked like it might burst at the seams around the width of him. 

“Jesus,” Jay said under his breath. His mouth was literally watering. He wasn’t sure he could actually get Mike’s cock in him-- He was maybe ten inches long and thick from the base to the tip. There wasn’t anything particularly monstrous about him beyond his size, and the wicked look on his face when Jay stared up at him, waiting for permission to do what they were both burning for. Jay was already getting hard again, just looking at Mike like this.

“I knew you’d be like this,” Mike said, and his hand was shaking a little when he ruffled Jay’s hair. 

“Like what,” Jay asked, though he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear it out loud. 

“Sweet for me,” Mike said, touching Jay’s face and grinning when this comment got Jay to scowl for him. “See, you hate it, you hate me showing you how sweet and good you are.”

“It’s sweet and good to be drooling for your dick?”

“ _Yes_ , oh god, Jay, yes. It is.”

Jay licked along the slit of Mike’s cock to get him to shut up. Mike made a strangled sound and pushed forward, probably without meaning to, dragging the shaft of his cock against Jay’s cheek. Jay moaned and let his eyes flutter shut, loved that feeling. 

“Fuck, fuck,” Mike said when Jay licked him again, up along the underside of the shaft, marveling at how it just went on and on and on, until Jay finally reached the wet tip again. “Can’t believe you were wasting this on people who couldn’t even watch,” Mike said, breathless and pawing at Jay’s hair again.

“Didn’t want them to see,” Jay said.

“How come?”

“Nn, I dunno. They didn’t deserve it.”

“That’s, _ahhh_ , that’s right, that’s true, they didn’t. I do, though, don’t I?”

“Mhmm.” Jay took Mike’s cock into his mouth so he wouldn’t have to otherwise answer. Though maybe doing so was the answer, really.

Mike was much noisier than Jay would have guessed: moaning and cursing, gripping Jay’s head with both hands at one point. Jay shivered and sighed happily around the insane width of Mike’s cock for how much he loved that feeling of having Mike’s hands on his head and in his hair, pushy and greedy but not too violent. It was a feeling that the gloryhole couldn’t give him. Nor could the guys he sucked off in a more traditional fashion, because they didn’t have Mike’s enormous hands, so big they didn’t quite feel human. Mike started to guide Jay’s head, pushing him down a little further to see if he could take it. Jay went slack and let him, loved that, too. 

“You’re so, so good, Jay,” Mike said for the tenth or hundredth time. He seemed to get off on describing Jay’s shamelessness this way. “Such a good boy for me, _yesss_.”

Jay huffed at being called a boy, also reached down between his legs to tug on his dick. He gripped himself just lightly, not ready to get desperate again yet. He was a couple of years younger than Mike and a whole lot smaller. Mike made much of this and always had, even back when Jay was like a raw nerve who was always ready to fly into a rage about it, because back then he’d hated being little. He’d hated Mike for being big, too, and for making Jay want him, Mike’s sheer hulking presence injecting Jay with with angry fantasies about how it would feel to be totally buried under Mike’s weight, held down by him, helpless.

Mike was getting close, holding Jay’s face with both hands and fucking into his mouth with as much restraint as he could manage. He was gentler than most of the gloryhole dudes, but that wasn’t saying much. When guys in the neighboring stall couldn’t see Jay’s face, they fucked his mouth like he wasn’t even a person. He liked it, feeling like some subhuman creature on a dirty bar floor, but he liked this better, especially the noise Mike made when he unloaded in his mouth, a little gut-punched thing that was softer than Jay would have guessed.

Jay swallowed as much as he could handle and then had to pull off, choking and taking the last two spurts right on his face. He wiped some off with a groan and collapsed back onto the couch, panting and hard. Watching Mike’s cock start to soften made him feel like he’d conquered some beast. He opened his arms instinctively when Mike dropped to his knees with an unfocused look on his face, still pretty gone. Mike leaned into Jay’s arms, between his legs, and tried to kiss him on the mouth again. This time Jay almost let him, but moaned and turned his cheek at the last second, letting Mike lick the come off his face instead. 

“Mhm, fuck.” Mike moaned, seeming to enjoy cleaning Jay off this way. “You, that was. Jay.”

“Yeah, I know I’m good at it.” 

“Knew you would be.”

“Fuck you,” Jay said, though he really just took this as a compliment. 

They grinned at each other, dopey. Jay twitched his hips a little, so Mike would feel how hard he was, his cock pressed to Mike’s gut while they leaned there together, both catching their breath. 

“Don’t do that anymore,” Mike said, eyes getting serious out of nowhere.

“Huh?” Jay said. He forced his hips to be still, wondered if he’d given Mike a stomachache by humping him there. Mike looked suddenly queasy and seemed to be trying to hold something in.

The serum wouldn’t let him, so he said it:

“I don’t want you to do that anymore. At the bar, with the gloryhole. With other people.” 

Mike’s big hands came to wrap around Jay’s sides, settled just under his ribcage. He looked desperate, and Jay knew this was the kind of sappy, sentimental shit that Mike was a slut for. He was already showing Jay his soft underbelly. Jay didn’t even have to tease it out of him. 

“Why not?” Jay asked, hiding his smile when he went in for the kill.

“Because you’re fucking mine, you little shit. Aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Jay said, annoyed that Mike had turned that around on him so easily. “Fuck me like I’m yours. Like you’re teaching me a lesson. Like I’ve been bad, and you have to put me in my place.” On your dick, he almost added, but decided that was too corny to actually say.

Mike’s eyes got big. He nodded and moved down to take Jay’s cock into his mouth: easy and even kind of sweet, like the kiss he wanted to give Jay on the mouth. Jay moaned and brought his hands to the back of Mike’s head. Mike had said he’d never been with a guy, so he’d never done this before. He was a natural, sucking Jay’s cock with the same energy he’d brought to eating him out, like he couldn’t get enough of how Jay tasted. 

Jay hadn’t even realized how close he was: he came fast and hard, shooting down Mike’s throat and saying his name again, holding him in place while he swallowed around Jay’s pulsing dick. Mike wouldn’t pull off until Jay was pushing at him, whining because it was too much, he was too sensitive to let Mike keep feasting on him. 

“Fuck,” Mike said when he pulled off, looking proud of himself. “That didn’t take long.”

“Mmph,” Jay said, weakly. 

Mike moaned like he couldn’t stand Jay sounding like that, broken up because Mike had taken him apart again, so easily. He kissed his way up over Jay’s chest, pausing to lick at his nipples until Jay was making watery little noises of near-complaint, feeling oversensitive there, too. 

“Gonna fuck you so right,” Mike said, murmuring this against Jay’s throat before sucking the skin there into his mouth, teeth closing in like a subtle threat that made Jay gasp a little. “Mhm, fuck, Jay. You’re never gonna want another dick, after you’ve had mine. Gonna make you lose your mind on this cock, so fucking ready to be in you--”

“Please,” Jay said, nodding and tugging at Mike’s hair. “Can’t wait, please, just-- Now, yeah.”

“You look so good like this,” Mike said, staring at Jay while he rooted blindly under the couch with one hand, looking for something. “Gonna look even better after I’ve wrecked you on my dick.”

“Lube?” Jay said when Mike found what he was looking for and held it up. Jay smirked. “You keep lube under our couch?”

Mike looked emotional, hearing that. Jay realized it was because he’d referred to the couch as something they co-owned. He rolled his eyes, lifted his legs up and reached down to spread his ass apart with both hands, making Mike refocus. 

“I told you,” Mike said, staring at Jay’s hole, which was presumably still pinked-up from Mike’s slobbering all over it, into it. “I jerk off back here sometimes,” Mike said, lifting the lube. “Thinking about you.” 

“What’s the nastiest fantasy you’ve had about me?” Jay asked, not just for the purposes of mocking Mike but because he sincerely wanted to know.

Mike didn’t even have to think about it, looked like he’d been waiting for Jay to ask:

“Watching you suck guys off for money in an alleyway,” Mike said. “And then, uh, taking the money, and telling you to do more.”

Jay snorted, surprised. “And I just obey you, in this fantasy?” he said, starting to get hard again for the thought. “For some reason?”

“For some reason,” Mike said, snapping open the lube. “The reason being, I told you to.” 

“Uh-huh, well, no one would be surprised to hear you want to enslave me sexually. But I’m surprised you’d beat off to me being with other guys. Since apparently you don’t want me to be, in real life.”

“It’s weird,” Mike said, nodding, thoughtful, smearing lube on his fingers. “It’s like, agony, a little. The idea of having to stand there and watch and being hard and wishing it was me. But that gets me off, somehow.”

“Maybe you’re a secret masochist,” Jay said. “I don’t need your fingers, by the way.” 

“Yes, you do. Jay, you just had my cock in your mouth. You’re familiar with the dimensions.”

Jay sighed and relented to being fingered. He liked it, anyway, and had thought about having Mike's thick fingers stuffed up his ass many times. But he felt impatient for the big finale, wanted to get Mike’s cock inside him before this truth stuff wore off. 

“Oh fuck,” Mike said when he pushed in, watching Jay hold his breath for the feeling of being filled. “You’re, ah. So fucking tiny, Jay. I don’t know, should we really--” 

“Shut up.” Jay laughed at the look on Mike’s face. “Yes, we should. Who do you think you’re talking to? I’m not delicate.”

“But you’re so tight,” Mike said, fucking into Jay with his finger, too slow. “Fuhhhhck, I’ve never, uh. Is it normal to be this tight?”

Jay shrugged. “What about me is normal. Who cares? Do what I told you to.” 

Mike’s eyebrows went up. He looked like he was considering torturing Jay for that command, but ultimately he just leaned down to lick at Jay’s dick as it started to rise off his belly, pumping his finger into Jay a little harder as he did. Jay whimpered and clenched up around Mike’s finger, so ready for more that it hurt, like a growing ache at the center of him that he couldn’t reach without Mike’s help. Mike had big fingers, but he still wasn’t deep enough inside, and he certainly wasn’t stretching Jay wide enough, the way he wanted. He wanted to barely be able to breathe for how full Mike had made him.

“More,” Jay said, begging when Mike pulled back to look at him. 

“Greedy brat,” Mike said. He was grinning, enjoying this. His finger had started to make wet sounds as he pumped it in and out, so far either avoiding or cluelessly missing Jay’s prostate. “Let me take my time.”

“Please fucking hurry,” Jay said, shaking his head. “I need, nh. Mike, I feel-- Weird, like. I really need it, something, ah, it’s something in that serum, I’m gonna, gonna die if you don’t, if you don’t fuck me, please--”

“Holy shit.” Mike kissed Jay’s knee and rubbed at his stretched rim with a second finger. “I, uh. I don’t even think I can get two of these into you, though?”

“Ungh, what do you know? Just use your dick, please. I promise you won’t hurt me.”

They stared at each other after Jay said so, like this was a real promise that the truth serum would hold them to, whether Jay was talking specifically about Mike’s big dick not hurting him or more generally, about the other thing that they were both actually afraid of: fucking this up in a way that would mean they didn’t just always have each other, no matter what, at an arm’s length but close enough to dull the ache of not having more. Neither of them were good at relationships, to put it mildly. They were both mean and selfish, petty and jealous and weird--

“Should I use a condom?” Mike asked. 

“You don’t have to,” Jay said, going hot across his cheeks. “I get tested all the time, you know. How I am. And I’m fine.” 

Mike looked like he was going to try to kiss Jay on the mouth again. Jay licked over his lips, maybe wanting it. A little. He was still relieved when Mike kissed his knee instead, slicking his cock with the lube like he couldn’t wait any longer either.

“Like this?” Mike asked, coming up onto his knees and lining up, watching Jay’s face. “You comfortable enough?” 

“Uh-huh,” Jay said, though his neck was starting to ache a little. He chewed his lip and put his hand against Mike’s chest when he shuffled closer on his knees. “Actually, here. Let me--”

Jay adjusted so that he was lying horizontal across the couch, flat on his back. Mike got the idea and clambered up onto the couch, between Jay’s legs, holding his slicked-up cock like it was a blunt instrument that he was nervous about using on Jay. 

“We barely fit,” Mike said, meaning on the couch together. 

“Fuck me so hard it breaks,” Jay said.

Mike whimpered.

“I meant the couch,” Jay said, smirking. 

“I want to treat you right, Jay,” Mike said, looking weepy. “You’re _my_ tiny prince. Aren’t you? The nerve of that fucker Plinkett, calling you that. I wanted to kill him.”

Jay had to fight hard against the urge to roll his eyes and ask Mike what the fuck. It wasn’t a question he really wanted the answer to.

“Please, Mike.” He writhed a little, arching his back and showing Mike how much he needed it, since telling him wasn’t working. “Please, please. I’m dying, okay, without that in me? Save me, give it to me ple-- _ahh_ \--, nn--”

There were two or three long, dragging seconds where it really fucking hurt, letting Mike push into him and split him open wide. Jay was accustomed to the feeling, just not usually in such intense proportions, because jesus fucking christ Mike was the biggest thing he’d ever had in him. Jay stayed calm, anyway, and breathed, his hands tight around Mike’s biceps while Mike inched in deeper, making soft noises at the back of his throat like he was going to cry or something. Jay would kill him if he ruined this by crying. He moaned at the first sharp explosion of pleasure that started to spread outward from his prostate as Mike’s cockhead dragged against it on the way in. 

Jay was whining by the time Mike was just halfway in, already overcome with disbelief that there could be more, more, fuck he just kept coming. Mike was trembling over Jay, covering Jay’s whole body with his by the time he was settling the last fat inches of his cock into Jay’s ass, both of them groaning and overwhelmed when he was all in. 

“Fuck,” Mike said, whispering this against Jay’s throat. Mike’s mouth was open there, his breath hot and damp. “Jesus, Jay, that’s. So fucking, nnh. Tight, feels so good.”

Jay whimpered and Mike kissed his way up toward Jay’s jaw, pecked his cheek. When Jay met Mike’s eyes he clenched up all over in something like shock, because wow this was really happening, Mike was right there, on top of him, inside him. Mike was so deep inside him that it was surreal. 

“Okay?” Mike asked, holding Jay’s face in his big hand, stroking his cheek with his thumb.

“Mhmm.” Jay nodded, and it was true, though he also felt like he was about to burst apart at the seams, so full that he was afraid to move even a little. He tried it anyway, and gasped at the feeling of Mike shifting deep inside him. 

“God,” Mike said, his voice breaking in a way that made Jay sure he was going to say something awful. “I really fucking-- Love you, just. So much.” He swallowed and looked down, like he knew Jay didn’t want to hear his. “I, ha. I’ve ruined my life on loving you.” 

“I don’t know what that means,” Jay said, petting Mike’s shoulders. “But I also love you, okay, so now that that’s out of the way can you please start fucking me?”

“I don’t know if I believe you,” Mike muttered, looking up at him again. “Is the truth serum still working? Do you think?”

“Ask me something I’d lie about if it wasn’t,” Jay said, in lieu of cursing him out for muddling this up with emotional shit.

“When did it start, for you,” Mike asked. 

Jay knew what he meant. Wanting this. He huffed and shifted under Mike, whining when it felt good and made him want so much more. 

“It was before you drove me to the airport,” Jay admitted, which he supposed made him the loser here, having wanted Mike longer than Mike had wanted him, though just by a little. “You winked at me after I laughed at something you said. Fuck, and it hit me like a cannonball, my dick kicked so hard that I was afraid you’d seen it, like, against the front of my jeans.” 

“Oh, fuck,” Mike said, finally pulling back, snapping forward. Mike’s eyes went wild for how Jay responded: head thrown back, mouth open, he squeezed Mike’s arms and cried for more. “Tell me,” Mike said, fucking Jay too slowly, with care. “More, go on.”

“Nn, tell you, what--?”

“Tell me all the times I made your dick hard and you hated me for it, Jay.”

Jay groaned and gave Mike a savage look, hoping this would inspire him to fuck harder, faster. Mike was easy to manipulate: it worked, and he was grinning down at Jay with that evil look in his eyes again, thank god.

“Yuh, yeah,” Jay said, bringing his legs up around Mike’s back, holding him in place. 

“I’m serious,” Mike said, because of course he was. “Other times, tell me about them.” 

“Mike--” 

“I’ll keep fucking you hard if you keep talking, Jay.”

Jay whined and put his hands over his face. He whined again when Mike reached up to pull them away and pinned them both to the couch alongside Jay’s ears. 

“I don’t know,” Jay said, desperate for Mike to start slamming into him again. It had felt so good, like almost too much, almost scary, perfect. Mike had slowed down to a near-stop, waiting for Jay to earn the kind of wild fucking he wanted. “Mhm, just. Anytime you yelled at some customer, ah, on the phone. When you’d tell them to fuck off and then slam the phone down. God, that. Yeah. I wanted you so bad, every time you did that. It felt like, like. Like when you winked at me. Us against the world.”

Mike didn’t need much, apparently: he went fucking nuts for this, pounding into Jay with an unhinged look on his face, giving him exactly what he wanted and watching him fall apart for it. Jay got so loud that he was sure that the people in the neighboring shops could hear him moaning for Mike’s cock and begging to be fucked harder, harder. He didn’t care if all of Milwaukee heard, as long as Mike kept fucking into him like this, like there was no stopping him and he was going to take whatever he wanted, everything.

Jay wasn’t sure if he should continue, but he could name other times Mike made him hard, if he had to: when Mike threw beer bottles over his shoulder like he didn’t give a fuck, scratched his balls when he thought Jay wasn’t looking, licked sauce off his fingers at fast food restaurants, smoked a cigarette while attempting to eat a cheeseburger. Everything Mike did that was gross, sloppy, awful. Jay wanted to get on his knees and open his mouth for all that filth, to be dirty and soaked in Mike’s come when they were done.

“I’m close,” Mike said, sweaty and shaking and still slamming into Jay with everything he had. “If, if I puh, put you in my lap, would you, could you-- Bounce on it, would you ride me?”

“Yes,” Jay said, voice so deep and broken-up that he sounded possessed. “Please, pluh, yeah--”

Mike grunted and shifted back, pulling Jay with him. Jay was loose-limbed and pliant, letting Mike maneuver both of them so that Mike was seated and Jay was straddling his lap, groaning low in his chest for how Mike seemed to be even deeper inside him like this. 

“Jesus, yeah, you look good,” Mike said. His voice was shaky. He pushed the Lightning Fast shirt off at last, letting it fall to the floor and leaving Jay completely naked in his lap. Mike leaned in to lick one nipple into his mouth, using this teeth on it, then the other. Jay moaned and rolled his hips, gasping, gone. He was going to come as soon as he touched his dick, or maybe even before. He adjusted himself until Mike’s cock was scraping over his prostate, braced his hands on Mike’s shoulders and outright shouted for how good it felt to start riding him, just like that, right there--

Jay had his eyes closed, so didn’t see it when Mike finally, finally gripped his cock in his big hand, just felt it. Jay went stiff all over, breath caught in his throat, and fell forward against Mike when he came for the first hot pump of Mike’s gripping fingers, helpless for how good it felt and almost crying by the time he was done, because Mike just kept pumping him, till it hurt, and Jay didn’t want him to stop even then.

“God, I’m gonna come,” Mike said, sounding sad about it. Jay had gone limp against his chest, legs splayed out around Mike’s thighs and head resting on Mike’s shoulder while he tried to recover some brain function, still buzzing all over. “Can I--?” Mike asked, taking hold of Jay’s fucked-open ass with both hands.

“Yeah,” Jay said, not even sure what he was granting permission for. Mike could do anything to him, Jay didn’t care, knew he was in good hands. Jay kissed Mike’s throat and pressed his face in tighter against the spot where he could feel Mike’s hammering pulse against his cheek.

“Oh fuck,” Mike said, pressing Jay up with his hands and then pushing him back down, lifting his hips to fuck into him as he yanked Jay’s body up and down, gingerly at first and then hard, grunting for every sharp downward push, his cock slamming up to slide through the wet squelch of Jay’s stretched-open ass as he fucked up into him again and again.

Jay moaned and sobbed a little, holding on to Mike’s shoulders and letting Mike jerk him up and down, his overstimulated hole raw and twitching around Mike’s dick. He needed Mike to come, to finish, to make him wet inside and leave him overflowing, more well-used than he’d ever been.

“Gonna take care of this ass every day from now on,” Mike said, sounding like he could barely talk but like he needed to say this, lips and teeth pressed to Jay’s ear, jaw tight. “You, you hear that? Huh? Gonna fuck you so good and hard, every day. Give you what you need.”

“Mike,” Jay said, soft and broken against Mike’s shoulder, knowing this would make him come. 

Mike groaned and crushed Jay against his chest when he unloaded inside him, hugging him so hard that for a moment Jay thought of his fear about being Hulked-out to death by Mike. Jay held on tight, too, riding it out while Mike pulsed inside him, Jay’s hole so sensitive by then that he could feel every throb of Mike’s release against his stretched-out rim, and then the wet slide of come leaking down out of him. Jay went limp against Mike and felt him begin to recover from how hard he just came. Mike was still panting as he eased his grip on Jay a little, his hands sliding through the sweat that coated Jay’s back. Jay really needed to pull off, but somehow wasn’t ready to stop feeling this full. It was too much, all messy, so good.

He sighed with relief when he felt Mike softening inside him and starting to slide out of him, and followed that feeling through to conclusion as he lifted off, groaning under his breath when he felt a fuckton of come gush out of his hole along with Mike’s spent dick. 

Mike was still pretty hazy from his orgasm. He let Jay straddle his leg, soaking his thigh with come in the process. Of course Mike didn’t mind having come smeared all over him and was in no hurry to clean up. Jay felt disgusting, also amazing. He kept having to remind himself not to kiss Mike on the mouth, and gave him hot, sloppy kisses on his neck instead. 

“I think think the truth serum was real,” Mike said, stroking Jay’s arm.

“Maybe,” Jay said, and he felt himself grinning when Mike did, breaking character. “How will we know when it’s worn off?”

“Do you love me, Jay?”

“Yes.”

“It’s still working.”

Jay snorted and bit at Mike’s jaw, where he was soft. Mike sighed and stroked Jay’s back. He looked content and strangely sweet, for someone who had just administered a merciless fucking. Jay was sore already, would be wincing every time he sat down by tomorrow, but he didn’t care. He liked it, and still felt keyed up, wanted to go rob a bank or something.

“You know what we gotta do next, right?” Jay said, slumping down under Mike’s arm. 

“Hmm.”

“Find that wizard who sold us the truth serum and get him to make some life-lengthening potion for us.”

“Oh, yeah. I was thinking the same thing.” 

“‘Cause we wasted like fifteen years not doing this and I want them all back, plus interest.”

Mike looked over at Jay with surprise. Jay shrugged. He could be a sap sometimes, too. It was allowed.

“What?” Jay said when Mike gave him an even worse look, like he wanted to say something terrible and true.

“Oh, nothing,” Mike said, stroking Jay’s hair. “Just. I hope you’re on board for what’s about to happen, man. Because I’m so fucking in love with you that it’s been killing me slowly since the turn of the century.”

Jay had never thought about it before, but they did meet at the turn of the century, in 1999. They were both Blockbuster Video employees at the time. Jay was a lowly cashier and Mike was an assistant manager. They had to work the New Year’s Eve shift, and after closing they went out and got shitfaced post-midnight, when the millennium had rolled over and the world’s computers were still working fine. Jay got too drunk to remember how the evening ended. Maybe they fucked that night and completely forgot, as part of some dark ritual that had lead them here, confessing their love for each other via magic potion. 

“I hired you,” Mike said. “Remember that?”

“Both times,” Jay said, nodding. His interview for the Blockbuster job had consisted of a single question, which Mike asked him while illegally smoking a cigarette in the store’s back room and looking extremely hungover: What are your three favorite movies?

Jay said that was a stupid question. Mike said: Correct. You got the job.

“Needed a hot piece of ass around to keep myself entertained,” Mike said, reaching down to squeeze Jay’s for emphasis.

“I wasn’t back then, though?”

“Yeah, you were. Or, I could see that you were, under the hot mess.”

“No, you couldn’t.” Jay refused to believe that Mike had been lusting after his potential. He’d seemed depressed when Jay got in shape and started taking care of himself, if anything. Maybe he’d thought his chances were even slimmer, post-improvements. “You fell in love with my sparkling personality, didn’t you?” Jay said, and he grinned when Mike cut him a humorless look, meaning Jay was right. “Ha. Sucker.”

“Fine, fine.” Mike narrowed his eyes and gave Jay’s ass another squeeze. “What can I say. I have a type.”

“What the fuck is your type, Mike?”

“Evil demons who hiss at me for fifteen years before they suddenly turn docile and pull their ass cheeks open for me, apparently.”

“That’s how you see me?”

“Well. Yes and no. Sometimes you’re this other thing.”

“Which is what.”

“I don’t know, human? Vaguely.”

Jay laughed, starting to feel normal again. He really wanted to kiss Mike, and was debating the seriousness of the germ situation and if it was worth the risk, staring at Mike’s mouth and chewing his own lip a little. 

“I’m gonna go home and take a shower,” Jay said. He moaned when he looked down at himself. Come was still leaking out of him, felt like it would never stop. The trip from the shop to his place would be terrible. “Come with me?” he said when he looked back up at Mike.

“Yeah,” Mike said, hugging his arm around Jay a little tighter. “Okay.”

They were both uncomfortable by the time they got to Jay’s place. The truth serum had worn off, and Jay felt emotionally hungover. He hated feeling emotionally anything and considered this the worst hangover he’d ever had, but at least Mike was with him, as usual. 

They peeled their clothes off and got into Jay’s shower together. Mike was big and Jay felt crowded, awkward. He had to ask Mike to hand him things that he couldn’t reach, blocked by Mike’s body. 

“You’re soaping my tits?” Mike said when Jay cleaned him there, perhaps taking more time with it than he absolutely needed to. 

“Yeah,” Jay said. 

“Do you have a secret thing for fat guys?” Mike asked, apparently feeling the need to comment on this a second time. 

“Just you,” Jay said, giving him a look like: shut up.

Mike did, and he grinned when Jay finished cleaning him and reached out of the shower for his toothbrush and toothpaste.

“I’m getting a new one after this,” Jay said, watching Mike brush his teeth while they stood there in the shower together, water blasting against Jay’s back. 

“A new one?” Mike said, around the toothbrush. 

“Yeah, just. That one’s yours now. Your post-rimming toothbrush. You should have a regular one, too.” 

“Got it,” Mike said after he’d turned to spit. “Two toothbrushes for Mike at Jay’s apartment. Do you have a special post-rimming toothbrush, too?”

“Eugh, no. Sorry, but please don’t expect me to ever return the favor. I’m not doing that.”

“You prude. Fine.” Mike put the toothbrush and paste on the shelf behind him and gave Jay a hammy grin. “Am I good?” he asked. 

“Yeah,” Jay said, something shifting in his chest, pressing outward against his ribs. “You’re good, you can--”

Mike was already kissing him, pulling Jay’s wet body against his. Jay had cleaned himself first, while Mike watched. It was awkward, and so was kissing him in the shower like this, but they both relaxed into it after a moment and sighed against each other. 

“You’re so little,” Mike said, reaching down to squeeze Jay’s ass with both hands. 

“This is the first thing that’s made me not hate it,” Jay said. 

“Aww, yeah? You like being little for me?”

“Okay, no, you just ruined it. Not anymore.”

Mike laughed hard and kissed him again. Jay used the kiss to hide the fact that he was laughing, too. Though Mike could probably feel it, because they were so close, holding on tight, Mike’s tongue pressing into Jay’s mouth. 

Jay had always had trouble with kissing. Like dancing, it made him feel stupid. Who could think about this seriously and still want to do it? What for? But now he got it, and he opened wider for Mike’s tongue when their kiss got more heated, deeper. The point of kissing like this was that Mike wanted to be inside him a little. Jay understood now, everything about all this sappy shit clicking together in his mind. He was too tired to fuck again, but it felt good to let Mike back in this way, just a little.

They fell asleep together in Jay’s bed after showering, and later Jay made Mike vegetable soup from scratch. Mike pretended to like it, at least. By the time they’d finished eating they had a list of twenty-eight great money-making ideas that would be aided by the use of truth serum. 

“Are we going to use it on each other again?” Mike asked, looking up from the list after they’d added _blackmail local politicians_ to it.

“Why would we?” Jay asked.

“Oh, so I’m supposed to believe you’re just going to be honest with me now? One fuck in?”

Jay laughed at that turn of phrase and shrugged. He felt like he didn’t have anything to lose by being honest, going forward. If Mike knew Jay loved him, wanted him, what did he really have to hide?

“It was pretty fun,” Mike said. 

“I can be way more unhinged than that while sober,” Jay said. 

Mike’s eyebrows went up. He seemed to consider debating this, then perhaps remembered Jay’s gloryhole days. 

“Maybe I should give you a tour of the back of my bedroom closet,” Jay said, though he really didn’t have that much sex toy shit. He just wanted to freak Mike out. “Or my recently watched videos on porn hub.” Those were even tamer, in reality: middle-aged bear fucking a blond twink, for the most part. 

Jay smirked evilly when he realized Mike was right to think he wasn’t going to get full honesty from Jay from now on. It was too satisfying to wind Mike up, all in good fun. 

“You’re a terrifying person, Jay,” Mike said. “I like that about you.” 

“I know you do.” 

Mike stayed over that night. Jay wasn’t sure that there weren’t some residual effects from the truth serum, and he didn’t trust the outside world with Mike when he was like this, especially honest and vulnerable. Mike was soft, a big baby. He curled up on Jay’s chest and let Jay wrap both legs around him while they watched a dumb movie that Mike would probably cry about or something, because it was a drama and had sad parts. 

Jay pet Mike’s hair and waited for him to get soppy. He could barely breathe for how heavy Mike was, slumped onto him like that. Jay knew he was weird for liking the feeling of being crushed, pinned, small. He was fine with this, and sank into it even more deeply, trying to get as underneath-Mike as he could.

**

**Author's Note:**

> In case anyone is unfamiliar, [Mike trying to eat a cheeseburger while smoking a cigarette](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFkkVhiR1Yo) is a classic Half in the Bag moment.
> 
> That whole video is peak hot mess soulmates 4ever content, really <3 


End file.
